Aziraphale (
temptationaccomplished) wrote in
tramitem_log2020-04-13 05:40 pm
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Entry tags:
pleased to meet you
Who: Aziraphale/Mr. Fell and Alec Hardy/Crowley
What: Aziraphale agreed to meet Anthony's cousin, Alec (known right now as Crowley), for Indian food. Anthony hasn't told either of them the whole truth.
When: Saturday, around 6pm because Aziraphale's avoiding a prior commitment.
Where: Adda Restaurant in Long Island City, Queens.
Rating/Warnings: Alec has no bedside manner. He does not people well. Aziraphale has his own peopleing issues. They both know something the other does not. We already can guess this will be a train-wreck--just don't know how many casualties there'll be, other than Aziraphale's heart. ...Or his reputation.
Meeting Anthony's cousin without discussing it first with Anthony was probably not a great idea, in retrospect. This Crowley fellow was already very paranoid and off-putting and prone to assumptions which were...well, they weren't exactly incorrect. Just that they were a little too close to on the mark, actually*
* Example one: Aziraphale wasn't dating Anthony, per se. Not in so many words. They were sort of headed that way, he liked to think. Hopefully. Flirting, exchanging numbers. The kind of thing people do in those initial steps. Crepes together had been nice, and they had agreed to meet to go to a Support meeting... And of course he had been invited to ride on Anthony's motorbike.
** Example Two: He wasn't part of a crime syndicate, but he really did not want to have to discuss that original memory in any more detail than he had, because Crowley was going to think he was some kind of criminal anyway. Anthony had. Thought he might be a hit-man, actually. And no, Aziraphale was never ever going to let Anthony live that one down. But it wasn't going to be even remotely funny to anyone else.
So really, he should have taken this as the bad idea it was and never formalized the arranged meeting. Instead, on Saturday morning, Aziraphale messaged Crowley to tell him the restaurant's address and re-confirm their meeting time, as if nothing at all was problematic with meeting the temperamental cousin-twin of your current crush/past-life-friend.
Wanting to make a good impression, he arrived early dressed in a nice soft sweater, button-up and bow-tie--nothing too fancy or flashy. He didn't know what this cousin might think of a older man with romantic interests in Anthony, but he wanted to come off as soft, friendly, unassuming and safe. All things he most definitely was.
Yes, right, this would go wonderfully.
What: Aziraphale agreed to meet Anthony's cousin, Alec (known right now as Crowley), for Indian food. Anthony hasn't told either of them the whole truth.
When: Saturday, around 6pm because Aziraphale's avoiding a prior commitment.
Where: Adda Restaurant in Long Island City, Queens.
Rating/Warnings: Alec has no bedside manner. He does not people well. Aziraphale has his own peopleing issues. They both know something the other does not. We already can guess this will be a train-wreck--just don't know how many casualties there'll be, other than Aziraphale's heart. ...Or his reputation.
Meeting Anthony's cousin without discussing it first with Anthony was probably not a great idea, in retrospect. This Crowley fellow was already very paranoid and off-putting and prone to assumptions which were...well, they weren't exactly incorrect. Just that they were a little too close to on the mark, actually*
* Example one: Aziraphale wasn't dating Anthony, per se. Not in so many words. They were sort of headed that way, he liked to think. Hopefully. Flirting, exchanging numbers. The kind of thing people do in those initial steps. Crepes together had been nice, and they had agreed to meet to go to a Support meeting... And of course he had been invited to ride on Anthony's motorbike.
** Example Two: He wasn't part of a crime syndicate, but he really did not want to have to discuss that original memory in any more detail than he had, because Crowley was going to think he was some kind of criminal anyway. Anthony had. Thought he might be a hit-man, actually. And no, Aziraphale was never ever going to let Anthony live that one down. But it wasn't going to be even remotely funny to anyone else.
So really, he should have taken this as the bad idea it was and never formalized the arranged meeting. Instead, on Saturday morning, Aziraphale messaged Crowley to tell him the restaurant's address and re-confirm their meeting time, as if nothing at all was problematic with meeting the temperamental cousin-twin of your current crush/past-life-friend.
Wanting to make a good impression, he arrived early dressed in a nice soft sweater, button-up and bow-tie--nothing too fancy or flashy. He didn't know what this cousin might think of a older man with romantic interests in Anthony, but he wanted to come off as soft, friendly, unassuming and safe. All things he most definitely was.
Yes, right, this would go wonderfully.
no subject
He also was well aware the man was mocking him, but that was fine. Let him think he had the upper hand.
"Would it be too personal of me to ask you what brought you to New York from central London?"
no subject
"A bit of a bold opener, but nothing too personal." Aziraphale shrugged, rearranging his silverware on the napkin in lieu of answering the question as he considered the merits of being open.
"When I was wrapping up at university," he said at last, "my grandfather pushed me for a law degree. Or barring that, the military." He grimaced. Lord knows he'd never have made it there. Just didn't have the stomach for either, law or war, honestly. "I fancied having the freedom to be...myself. So I did what any reasonable headstrong twenty-something would do: I packed my things and left. New York seemed like such an adventure."
And it was, though maybe all Aziraphale had really needed at the time was the space and distance. He could have gone anywhere.
"And how about you?"
no subject
"Doesn't everybody." Fancy the freedom to be themselves, he meant. Typical place to do it, America. Nothing screamed freedom in your ear until you and everyone else were stone cold bloody deaf. But that Fell had remained so long said that he found something here worth having. He wondered what it could be. He'd never understood the appeal himself. Staying. Traveling. One place was very much like the other to him; each annoying in their own little ways.
Anyway that left a good opener.
His tea arrived just then and he took a second to spoon in two sugars before crossing his arms on the table and staring at its amber depths. Then he looked up at Fell.
"I was sent to look after Anthony. His mum likes to think he doesn't know how to take care of himself. I used to think that too. But-- he's proved me wrong. He's still reckless and a complete idiot, but he's settled down, got himself a girlfriend of five years. Likely a wife too if Aunt Evelyn gets wind of it. He'll be shuttled down the aisle faster than he can say no. Two point five children before he's even realized what's happened.
I think he considers you a friend." Which was a lot given Fell's overall frumpiness. Anthony had always been keen to maintain his brand so to speak, and Fell was nothing close to that.
"I think he knows more about you than he lets on. Which means he doesn't want me to know. Which worries me. Because I also think he doesn't know you that well. Still testing the waters so to speak. I don't like this game. I'm not good at this game. But for Anthony's sake, I'll play it. Because he's a complete ass and rubbish at being anything close to upstanding or earning the respect his mother wants him to have. He's loud and a braggart and drives too recklessly. But under all that he has a good heart that is too easily broken.
Do you understand that?"
no subject
Truthfully, he didn't know Anthony well enough to be devastated in one regard, but he could be utterly heartbroken over the possibility of what might have been. Which was enough, really. Aziraphale would probably have a frustrated cry over it later in the privacy of his own home.
But something deep and sour and familiar sunk into his gut and stuck. It was more than just that disappointment. More than I feel like there's something between Anthony and I, and I wanted a chance to explore that connection.
He didn't like what Crowley was saying. Shuffled down the aisle faster than he could say no. Children before he's even realized what's happened. That didn't speak to choice. That spoke of obligation. Of expectations. Of trying not to be the disappointment just to appease a family who thought they knew what was best and was going to impose it upon Anthony whether he agreed to it or not. It was exactly what Anthony had told him that afternoon over crepes when everything felt fragile and truthful.
And maybe he loved the girlfriend. Aziraphale believed that could easily be the case. Five years was a long time to be with someone, so of course he did. Maybe all he would ever be to Anthony was a friend. But as his friend, Aziraphale felt Anthony shouldn't be forced to make these decisions and re-position his life because some blunt force like Crowley or Evelyn or whoever came in to tell him to do so.
"I understand that this is the shovel talk after all," he said, rising angrily to lean over the table, schooling his voice into something that was barely contained. People were noticing. He was making a scene. This was going to end badly, embarrassingly for all and yet he was swept up in it and couldn't bring it back down. "I understand you're on a misguided mission to 'babysit' a grown man and force him to make decisions about who he is allowed to be friends with and what he does with his life. Do you understand that, Crowley? I'm not playing a game, here--you all are. Maybe that's why he left--to get away from this overbearing governing of his life. Anthony is an adult. Let Anthony decide if he marries her."
no subject
"I plan to. I want to see him truly happy in his own way. However it shakes out." He stood then, taking out the money for both meals and flipping it on the table. The tip is a bit meager but he also doesn't have much to go by.
"You're a good man, Fell. I'm glad you're his friend. He needs someone like you." And then shoving his wallet back into his pocket he finishes, somewhat awkwardly.
"Take care." And he'll head out unless someone is inclined to stop him.
no subject
But at that smile he huffed angrily and thought it an absolute shame that throwing a drink in someone's face also probably qualified as assault.
And then it was like whiplash; Crowley didn't turn some smug bastardly comment his way, didn't return anger with anger. He agreed. The asshole agreed in a way that seemed to say he had agreed all along, and then complimented him and left!!
Flustered and now thrown off, Aziraphale fumbled out an apology to the waitstaff and neighboring table, added more to the tip, and hurried to catch Crowley outside.
"Don't you dare just walk off from me--" He was a little out of breath from getting so worked up. "What the hell was that? What do you think you're playing at?"
no subject
He pretended he hadn't heard and power walked across the street, just catching the end of the cross walk sign.
no subject
It was an exhausting bit of nonsense and he felt toyed with. Like the roses in the bin: just here to serve some kind of performative function so that this odd cousin could do whatever it was he thought he was doing, protecting Anthony.
Well, he couldn't very well go back in the restaurant. Not after all that. Yet another perfectly fine eatery ruined for him by a Crowley. And he couldn't just stand here on the curb like an idiot.
Time to take his broken heart home like an adult, find himself a bottle of wine, and have a good cry.
no subject
He waited until he got back down to the subway station to lean against the wall as a cold sweat broke over him. Damned thing. But maybe, he hoped, it would all be worth it in the end--