"I'd rather experience them myself. If they are happy then..it gives me something to look forward to. And maybe that is all i really need." Because all the death ones really are crushing some of his spirit and dragging his typically happy attitude into one a lot more somber. And as a performer, it really effects how he comes off on stage if he isn't feeling upbeat.

He had hoped all his memories weren't so depressing so maybe he is getting all the hard ones out of they way so that he can really enjoy the good ones.